Monday, January 31, 2011
Take love. Not just admiration or mild flirtation. Real love. The kind of love that changes you, evokes emotions without words, builds a whole comfortable world for you to exist in blissfulness with someone who is your other half in every sense.
Take that love and subtract 411 miles. Love at 411 miles exists through written and spoken words. All the elements of a normal relationship are stripped away in the physical sense and you have communication and memories of precious hours spent together after long trips in the car.
In between days I have learned so much about relationships. Lessons that are hidden when you are with someone physically every day.
I've learned that waiting for someone to arrive at your door can be just as exhausting as watching them leave.
I've learned that not only does a picture speak a thousand words, it conveys just as many emotions and promises.
I've learned that there is no room for jealousy. Mistrust will shake the foundation, and the building is too precious to allow it to crumble under the weight of suspicion.
I've learned that your world can revolve around someone even if you can't see them every day.
I've learned that arguments are should be chosen carefully, because any words exchanged should be pleasant. Its important to remember that each exchange is a gift best not spoiled by insecurities and issues that really aren't that important anyway.
I've learned the art of compassion. Imagination is required to listen to the day to day life of a place you've never seen, people you've never met, a world you don't exist in. Not just listening but giving genuine interest and understanding.
I've learned that not only can the other person be your lover when you are together, but they can also be your fantasy, replacing all other fantasies, because when they are away they exist in your mind as an object of desire, and when they are with you those fantasies come to life.
At 411 miles the future means everything. It's a waste of emotion to dwell on things that have already happened. Useless to look backwards. Forward thinking is what gets you through the day.
I've learned how to fight. I've felt someone fight for me. Every step in this journey is a step wearing heavy shoes, and makes us stronger.
Most importantly I've learned how to be thankful for this person. I take nothing for granted. Each "i love you" is worth more than the stars in the universe, and I'm holding on to those I love yous tightly. As hard as this is, I have learned not to dwell on the difficulty too much, and be thankful that I have him at 411 miles, rather than have nothing at all.
I love you darling.